Part 1: Contrast and Compare; Part 2: Sociology Experiment

CONTRAST AND COMPARE

Yesterday I was able to:

·       Turn the pages on my novel for about 20 minutes

·       Make myself something to eat for breakfast and lunch

·       Answer the phone twice

·       Watch UCLA win the College World Series on tv

·       Write on my blog

Today I:

·       Brushed my teeth

    Took out the kitchen trash

·       Brought in the barrels

·       Brought in the mail

·       Called Comcast about our lousy phone service

·       Arranged for broken window repair

·       Researched various health conditions online

·       Started dinner in the crockpot

·       Researched essential oils use to repair nervous system

·       Posted several important or useful (and a few worthless) Status Updates on facebook

·       Unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher

·       Made myself something for breakfast and lunch

·       Printed, signed and mailed a form for a rebate

·       Scooped the kitty litter box

·       Went to a therapy appointment

·       Refilled dog and cat food containers

·       Entered a contest to win a blender

    Answered the phone three times

·       Took a shower and washed my hair!  :)

    Sat upright, in the kitchen, the entire meal, to eat dinner

·       Writing on my blog

WHY the contrast between yesterday and today?  What made the difference between yesterday and today?  And what will tomorrow be like?  This crazy condition is so unpredictable.   I really would like to get out and have more human contact but really can’t plan much due to this unpredictability.  

So, if one day, I show up at your front door spontaneously, uninvited, and catch you in your jammies, please don't think I'm rude or crazy.  Just know I'm feelin' good and want to share my moment of "normalcy" with you!!!

PART TWO: MY SOCIOLOGY EXPERIMENT

 

There are so many things I have not been able to do that they’ve really stacked up.  I don’t feel too guilty about it since it’s almost completely out of my control. 

One of those nagging tasks:  I have been needing to go online, print, sign and return a form for a rebate for a purchase I made back in April.  The vendor has contacted me at least four times to complete this form because they won’t close their Customer Satisfaction file until I do.  Each time they call or email me, I apologize and assure them I will get it done (I don't give any explanation as to my present situation).  That doesn’t seem to make them happy enough and each time, the Rebate lady has got a little more curt and seems a little more exasperated.

On good days, I attend to the most critical tasks.  But, not only has it been a struggle to sit up for any length of time in a chair near the printer, my laptop has not been working well at all.  Jeff took it into the repair shop last Tuesday and I just got it back yesterday.  I got the rebate form printed this morning JUST before they called again!  Seriously. What timing!   I could tell the agent was feeling impatient with me again.  She was talking really fast and told me that I was not complying with the terms of the agreement!  It was then that I decided to do a little experiment.

Since, whenever I describe the symptoms of my mystery health condition, every lay person I know immediately thinks that I have M.S., it is becoming pretty easy for me to just reply to new inquirers, “I have all of the symptoms of M.S.” and that helps them get a grasp on the situation without going into the entire history and the seemingly endless list of symptoms. 

Yes, I’m getting to my little experiment.  So, when the Rebate Lady told me again that I needed to sign the form, but then must scan the signed form and return it by email, I told her, “I have M.S. and can’t get up the stairs today to get the scanner.”  She exclaimed, “OH!  No problem!  It is TOTALLY OK to sign it and just return it in the regular mail!  I’m so sorry if I was rushing you or talking too fast! Can we help you with anything else today?  blah, blah, blah.”  

All it took for her to completely change her attitude towards me was telling her I had a fairly serious, disease.  Bazinga!  INSTANT accommodation, tolerance and patience!

The Rebate Lady is just one person who I’ve come across recently that has treated me with less kindness or respect that I feel any and every human deserves. 

For instance, on a lot of days, it’s been a struggle to just get dressed and brush my teeth.  (But, boy oh boy, when I CAN just get dressed and brush my teeth, that makes a HUGE difference in my mental outlook for the day).  When I have been able to get out to pick up some supplements or a few groceries or to the doctor’s office, I usually have been dressed in sweats and a tshirt.  Rarely do I style my hair, put on make-up or jewelry, and certainly nothing closely related to a fashionable outfit. (And, ew, greasy hair on many occasions).  Since March, I have put on almost 15 pounds due to inactivity as well as the inability to plan and prepare healthy, low calorie meals (and the low motivation to say no to those chocolate ice cream bars Jeff brings home a couple times a week) - so not only do I wear pretty much only sweats and a t-shirt for comfort, but because it’s pretty much all that fits.  Haha and I also must mention that sometimes I walk like a drunk - or like I'm half asleep.  It's that motor skills issue that closely resembles the gate of an M.S. patient.
You get the picture.

I've found that strictly appearance-wise (when I'm the aforementioned grungy version of myself), I get less customer service, less middle-class citizen assistance and MORE low-income-appearing citizen help and consideration.  Well, well, well.  Go figure.  Hmmmm.......

What I learned from this:  I will try to never judge.  I’ve learned that we can’t ever, or should never, assume someone’s attitudes or character.  They really may be lazy, indifferent, impatient, or whatever.  But who’s to say that they aren't just displaying those behaviors because they are really suffering from an illness, pain, tragedy, injustice, depression, misfortune or any other factor(s) that may effect their demeanor, actions (or lack thereof), choices, etc.?  Maybe even Rebate Lady has personal problems resulting in her lack of patience with me?  Now, that's really something for me to ponder.....

I pray that we can all be more in tune with one another.  To be able to be in tune enough to not judge and be able to be sympathetic, empathetic, compassionate  or just not judgemental.